LGBTQ Affirming Therapy in Los Angeles, CA

How being seen in therapy is essential to surviving and thriving for queer and trans clients

What is LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy?

LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy is psychotherapy that is supportive of and respectful of the needs and unique experiences of members of the LGBTQIA+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, intersex, asexual + more) community. LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy views individuals and their sexual orientation or gender identities not as problems to be fixed, but as real, valid, and worth celebrating. Because the fields of psychology and mental health have a dark history of pathologizing sexual and gender minorities, therapists who themselves identify as part of the LGBTQIA+ community or allies have recognized the need to seek greater education and training to be able to undo the harm these fields have done in the past, and learn how to help our clients embrace themselves and their identities. 

In a world where there are currently numerous attacks on the human rights of this community, LGBTQIA+ affirming therapists do not just “tolerate” our queer and trans clients, but validate and value them, and feel passionate about supporting them in navigating these stressful times. 

What LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy can help with:

Questioning or coming out

If you’re questioning or exploring anything related to sexuality, sexual orientation, or gender, and looking for a safe and supportive place to talk about it, talking to an LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist can help you in the process of understanding yourself and your identity better. Your therapist does not have all the answers, and they should never tell you how to identify - but they can help you figure out what makes sense for you, and how you have come to understand these parts of who you are. And if coming out is a next step for you, having a supportive place to process what that might mean for your life and relationships, and how to safely navigate that, can be invaluable. 

Relationship issues

Maybe you’re nervous about dating, navigating your first queer relationship, or maybe you’ve been happily married since gay marriage was legalized! If you are concerns about relationships, fears about dating, or are recognizing patterns that aren’t working for you in your relationships, therapy can be a helpful place to process and understand yourself better. If you’re feeling distant and disconnected from your partner, or getting stuck in the same arguments over and over, couples therapy can help you learn new ways to communicate and strengthen your bond. When talking about relationship issues with an LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist, you don’t have to worry that yours is the first queer relationship the therapist has ever encountered, and they are not going to try to fit your relationships into hetero or gendered expectations!

Sexual issues

Nervous to talk about sexual concerns? For many LGBTQIA+ affirming therapists, part of being affirming is also being sex-positive. We believe sex is healthy and pleasurable, and we are comfortable talking about it! While it may still be taboo to discuss these things in other parts of your life, in therapy you are welcome to talk about sex - sexual compatibility with partners, sexually transmitted infections, pain or other difficulties during sex, sexual fantasies, kinks, etc!

Anxiety and Stress

Whether you’ve struggled with anxiety most of your life, or whether you’re suddenly overwhelmed with stress due to current events and politics, you may benefit from support in learning new coping skills and ways to manage that anxiety and stress. An LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist not only has the foundational psychological understanding of anxiety, but also understands and can help you unpack how growing up/living in a cis-normative/hetero-normative world can contribute to the anxiety and minority stress you experience. And your therapist is not going to dismiss your anxiety or tell you that all of your worries are irrational - many of the fears queer and trans people have right now around their rights and safety are very real and valid. But your therapist can help you explore ways to regulate your nervous system and increase safety and community to cope with those stressors. 

Self-esteem

If you’ve ever felt “less than”, called names, been disrespected, threatened, or worse because of your sexual orientation or gender identity, those experiences can have a very big impact on your self-esteem. Feeling validated people in your life, including your therapist, can help to strengthen your sense of self-worth. Examining the narratives you’ve been told or have internalized about yourself, and re-writing these with the help of a therapist, can change how you see yourself and help you feel more confident as you move forward in your life.

Trauma

As sexual and gender minorities, LGBTQIA+ folks are disproportionately at a higher risk for experiencing trauma. Trauma comes in many shapes and forms, and despite how you may hear people talk about it, there is no “hierarchy” where certain traumas are “worse” than others. If you are struggling with symptoms or feeling stuck in your life in ways that may be connected to negative past experiences, whatever those past experiences were, it may be helpful to process them in therapy with a trauma-informed LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist who uses evidence-based modalities such as EMDR Therapy for trauma treatment. And working with an LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist will help you to understand your experiences in the context of broader systemic factors that contribute to the traumatic experiences of queer and trans people, as well as how your resilience and joy can be a part of your healing. 

How to find an LGBTQ+ affirming therapist

The internet is probably the easiest way to find a therapist these days - whether you’re googling “LGBTQ-affirming therapist near me” or filtering by “LGBTQ” in an online directory such as PsychologyToday.com, there are a lot more options now than there used to be. But in making this important decision, be sure you take a close look at the profiles and websites of therapists who describe themselves as LGBTQ-affirming, and see what other information they provide - is this a main area of focus in their work? Do they have extensive experience working with this community? Do they themselves identify as a member of the community? Do they also specialize in something specific to your concerns - such as anxiety, relationship issues, or trauma? Do they offer a free consultation call so you can ask more questions to make sure they’re the right fit for you before booking a session?

Or ask your community! Your local LGBTQ center may have a referral list, or your queer and trans friends who have been in therapy may be able to give you the names of therapists they have had positive experiences with. 

Allison Marx is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Registered Art Therapist in Los Angeles, CA. She specializes in LGBTQIA+ affirmative, poly/ENM-friendly, and kink-knowledgeable therapy for couples/partnerships and individuals.

Interested in therapy? Reach out to schedule a free consultation call!